Life Ain't Always Beautiful
by Angel N Darkness
Summary: Marissa Marks is an investigator and lives outside of Charming, California. Her best friend is involved with Juice but Marissa steers clear of the club and the Sons. What happens when Jax realizes who Marissa is and that she is hurt?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: So yes another new SoA story but once again I wrote it all out and it's finished… LOL! I'm hoping depending on how I am feeling to have my older SoA stories all updated by Friday…

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA…

Marissa loved living outside of Charming, California. She loved what she did for a living. She just loved being able to help people. This is one of those times though where she wished that she wouldn't have agreed to helping someone. It wasn't that she didn't like going into Charming it was just that right now she really didn't have the time to spare. After all she was still finishing up something.

She looked at Charity and glared. "Why do I need to go into Charming?"

Charity sighed and said "Come on Marissa you know you won't turn me down. I just need for you to talk to this guy and get the information. I've tried talking to him but he won't talk to me."

Marissa shook her head. "Damn it Charity I'm still finishing up a case. I don't have time to do your cases also."

Charity let out a breath and said "Marissa I haven't asked you for help in a while. Surely you can do this once for me. I just need for you to talk to him."

Marissa sighed and said "Fine but it's going to have to wait. I need to finish up this case and then maybe I can get to your guy late tonight. Will where you be?"

Charity smiled. "I'll be with Juice tonight. Just call me or come by the Teller-Morrow Automotive."

Marissa nodded even though she wanted to scream. "I'll just call you. You know I don't like being around the guys."

Charity sighed but nodded. "I know that and I wish I knew why. They are my family now Marissa."

Marissa just shook her head and stood up. "I have to go. I'll let you know as soon as I know anything."

Charity stood up too. "Thank you for this Marissa."

Marissa nodded and picked up her purse and light jacket and walked out of her house. She knew that Charity would lock up when she left. She loved Charity but sometimes she wished that she could tell the girl no. She jumped in her car and sped off to where she was meeting the person she needed to talk to. She had a bad feeling about the meeting that was coming but she shook it off. After all she knew how to take care of herself.

-LAAB-

Charity walked into the office of T-M Automotive and sat down and said "Gemma I'm worried."

Gemma looked up from what she was doing and looked at the woman she has come to think of as an adoptive daughter. "What has you worried baby girl?"

Charity looked at Gemma and sighed. "I'm worried about Marissa. I know that the case she is finishing up is a tough one and she has to meet the person who hired her services today. She was acting strange and almost bit my head off when I asked her to help me with my case."

Gemma sat back in her chair and looked at Charity. "Well you could always ask Juice or one of the other guys to go with her."

Charity shook her head. "No, I can't. She didn't even tell me where she was meeting this guy. The thing is Gemma she was being followed and I'm not even sure she realized it."

Gemma's mouth dropped open at that. "What makes you think she was being followed baby girl?"

Charity sighed. "I saw the guy as she was leaving. He was watching her closely from his car and as soon as she pulled out he pulled out right behind her. I followed behind for a little bit but then came here and every turn she made he made too. Something is going to go down and I don't know what to do."

Gemma stood up and walked around the desk and over to Charity and put her arm around her shoulder. "It's alright baby girl. We'll figure out what is up. Let's go talk to the guys."

Charity nodded and stood up. She gave Gemma a quick hug and then followed Gemma out of the office. She knew that Marissa would be mad at her but she didn't really care. She just wanted her friend to be alright. She needed for her friend to be alright.

-LAAB-

Marissa waited on her contact outside the seedy looking bar. She still couldn't believe that she had agreed to meet him here. She felt her pocket and let out a relieved sigh when she felt the knife in her pocket. She also had a gun strapped to her ankle. She smiled a little as she thought about how nobody even knew she carried a gun on her ankle.

She looked up when she heard footsteps and saw Bradley coming to a stop in front of her. "It's about time you get here. I'd like to finish this because I have something else I need to do."

Bradley glared at the tone that the slip of a woman used on him. "Don't take that tone with me. I'm paying you for your time. Now what do you have for me?"

Marissa swallowed a sigh. "Well you were right about your business partner. He is selling secrets from your company to your competitors. Everything is right here in the folder. Now my job is done and I have to get back so I can do this other job. You know my number if you need anything else Bradley."

With that Marissa watched as Bradley walked away before turning her back and walking away herself. The hair on the back of her neck was standing on end so she glanced around and didn't see anything so she started to walk across the street to her car. She heard a noise and looked back up and saw a car aiming straight for her. She didn't even get the chance to jump out of the way. The car struck her head on throwing her up into the air before she landed hard on the ground. She was in so much pain she didn't even notice that the car was backing up until it ran over her leg making her scream out in pain.

-LAAB-

Charity was telling the guys about Marissa when her cell phone started going off. When she pulled it out of her pocket she paled a little when she saw that it was Marissa. She didn't know why but she had a bad feeling about this phone call.

"Hey girl." Charity answered her cell phone.

On the other end Marissa was trying to stay conscious. "I need you."

Charity jumped up at that making all the Sons look at her questioningly. "What is it? Where are you?"

Marissa groaned in pain as she tried to move but couldn't and bit out through her pain "Well I'm currently lying in the middle of the street after being hit by a car straight on and then getting ran over by the same car."

Charity gasped and said "What do you mean you are lying in the middle of the street? Damn it Marissa where in the fuck are you?"

At that Gemma quickly walked over and pulled the phone from Charity's shaking hand and said "Marissa this is Gemma Morrow. Where are you and are you okay?"

Marissa let out a shaky laugh. "No I'm not alright. I'm out in the open and the bastard who hit me and then ran me over could come back and finish the job at any minute. I'm outside this seedy looking bar in Lodi."

Gemma swore. "Can you move at all? Did you call an ambulance?"

Marissa once again let out a shaky laugh. "I called for an ambulance and when I told them what had happened they said that the closest ambulance is forty five minutes away. I don't have that long and I can't even move to get my gun in case the mother fucker comes back."

Gemma gripped the phone tighter and then looked at Clay. "You and the guys need to get to Lodi. Marissa was hit by a car and then ran over. She can't move at all and dispatch told her the closest ambulance was forty five minutes away."

Clay swore and said "Let's go boys. We have a lady to save."

Gemma took in a deep breath. "Marissa just try to stay calm. My husband Clay and the men are on the way. Is anybody even trying to help you?"

"Nobody is trying anything. They are all just standing around looking at me." Marissa said through gritted teeth.

Gemma sighed. "Well try to stay on the phone with me. The guys will be there shortly."

Marissa sucked in a breath. "I'll try but I'm bleeding badly and it hurts to talk let alone breathe."

Gemma nodded even though she knew Marissa couldn't see her. "Just do as best as you can sweetie. Do you have any clue on who it could be that did this to you? I take it that it was done intentionally."

Marissa felt as if something was pressing on her chest and she said "I can't say right now. Everything is going black."

Gemma heard Marissa's breathing become even shallower and she shouted "NO YOU STAY WITH ME!"

-LAAB-

Marissa was trying to focus on what Gemma was screaming but the darkness was taking over. In the distance she could have swore she heard motorcycles but she couldn't be sure. The pain she was in was unbearable. She didn't know what to do or if she could do anything. She just knew that she was fighting a losing battle but she knew that if she gave up then it would be game over for her.

-LAAB-

Clay and Jax came to a stop when they saw a woman lying in the middle of the street. They knew that they had picked the right bar. They quickly got off of their bikes followed by Opie, Happy, Juice, Tig and Chibs and rushed over to her.

As soon as Jax saw who was laying on the ground he swore and said "God damn it Rissa, I thought I told you to knock off the dangerous shit."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: So I know a lot of you are ready to kill me for the cliffy and I'm sorry but in this chapter you'll find out how Jax knows Marissa…

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA…

As soon as Jax saw who was laying on the ground he swore and said "God damn it Rissa, I thought I told you to knock off the dangerous shit."

Clay looked at Jax sharply. "You know Marissa?"

Jax sighed even as he dropped to his knees beside Marissa on the road. "Yea, I know Marissa. I never thought that Charity was talking about Marissa Marks. We need to get her medical attention and quick."

Chibs knelt down on the other side of Marissa and started checking her over. "Her leg is crushed and she could have internal bleeding. Normally I'd say we need to wait for an ambulance but she could die before the ambulance gets here. One of us needs to put her on our bike and drive her to the hospital."

Jax looked up and said "I'll take her with me. If she realizes she is being moved and she doesn't recognize you she'll get agitated. She'll recognize me even though she hates me."

Clay once again looked at his stepson. "Why does she hate you?"

Jax shook his head. "I'm not getting into that right now. I'll fill you in later. Right now I need to get her up and I need help getting her on my bike."

Clay nodded. "Alright Chibs and I will help you get her on your bike and then we will follow you to the hospital."

Jax nodded and watched as Chibs and Clay carefully picked Marissa up off of the ground. He rushed back to his bike and got on and then scooted back some as Clay and Chibs put Marissa on his bike gently. He wrapped his arms around her carefully and made sure she stayed in place as he started his bike. Once he had his bike started he situated Marissa closer to him so that he could hold on to her and still drive. He didn't want anything else to happen to her. He then took off towards Charming and St. Thomas hospital with the rest of the guys behind him.

As he rode he looked down at Marissa and felt a pang hit his chest. He wondered what had happened to her and now he knew. He couldn't really blame her for avoiding him. He sighed as he thought about the last time he saw Marissa.

_Jax walked into a bar and automatically he looked around. His eyes bulged when he saw a woman at the bar talking to a tall man. At first he thought he was seeing things but it soon became clear to him that no the woman was who he had first thought it was. He couldn't believe that she was here._

_He walked over to her and said "Hey Marissa."_

_He watched as Marissa turned towards him and her mouth dropped open before she said "Jax."_

_He smirked and said "So you do remember me. I thought that you had forgotten all about me baby."_

_Marissa glared at Jax. "Actually I have. Why would I want to remember you when I walked in on you screwing one of my best friends?"_

_Jax glared at her and said "I wasn't fucking her! How could you actually believe that? She was trying to get me to fuck her and when you walked in I was trying to push her off of me!"_

_Marissa snorted. "It don't matter anymore Jax. I should have listened to my sister."_

_Jax shook his head. "What do you mean you should have listened to Tara?"_

_Marissa laughed at that. "Exactly that Jax. Tara may have been your best friend but she still warned me about you. To late did I realize why she tried to warn me. I should have known that you would break my heart the way you did."_

_Jax stepped forward and said "You're the one who left me! I didn't leave you!"_

_Marissa threw her head back and laughed. "No, Jax you didn't leave me! You chose to fuck around on me. It's over and done with now. I'm done with you. I never want to see you or ever meet and see anyone in the club. Thankfully I kept away from that."_

_Jax watched her in shock as she turned and walked away from him. He couldn't believe she had said everything that she had. He could tell that she was still hurt and he wanted to make it up to her but he wasn't sure how. Little did he know that she watched as he got trashed that night and saw some girl give him a blow job. _

Jax came out of his thoughts as he pulled up to St. Thomas hospital. He knew that he was going to have to tell guys Marissa's full name and he wasn't looking forward to that at all. He took in a deep breath when Clay and Chibs hurried over to him to help get Marissa off of the bike so that he could get off.

"There is something you all need to know before we walk into the hospital." Jax said.

Clay looked at Jax and said "What is it son?"

Jax sighed and looked Clay in the eyes. "Marissa's full name is Marissa Marks Knowles. She is Tara's sister."

Clay gasped and said "I didn't even know that Tara had a sister."

Jax nodded. "Tara never talks about her because she feels like she let Marissa down. That is a whole other story. But lets just say that it wasn't Tara I was dating in high school like you all thought I was. I was dating Marissa who was a year younger and we were together up to a couple of years ago."

Clay nodded. "You can tell us later. Right now we need to get Marissa into the hospital. Is that why you said when you first saw Marissa that you had told her to stop doing stupid shit?"

Jax nodded. "I'll also explain that comment later too. But you are right we need to get Marissa into the ER. I also know that Tara is going to freak out when she realizes it is her baby sister."

Clay nodded and said "We'll have Opie call her. It seems like the two of them are really close and have gotten closer since Donna's death."

Jax smiled and nodded. "Those two have always been close. I was actually surprised that it was Donna and not Tara that Op married."

Clay nodded again and said "Alright lets get her inside the hospital. We need to make sure that she is alright. Has she regained consciousness at all?"

Jax shook his head. "Not that I have noticed. Then again I was lost in thoughts on the way here."

Clay and Chibs both nodded as they gently lifted Marissa off of Jax's bike so that Jax could get off. Once Jax got off the bike he took Marissa from them and ran into the hospital trying to not move her to much.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! I'm glad you all like the story…

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA!

As soon as Jax walked into the Emergency Room he yelled "I need a Doctor!"

Tara who was working in the Emergency Room because of someone calling in sick recognized Jax's voice and took off running to him. As soon as she got to him she noticed who he had in his arms and her face paled. If it wouldn't have been for Chibs she probably would have fallen.

"What happened to Marissa?" Tara demanded once she got her composure back.

Jax sighed. "I don't know the details Tara. All I know is what she relayed to Charity and then to Gemma. She was hit by a car head on and then the car ran over her leg. She was finishing up some kind of job."

Tara swore. "Damn it I told her not to take that job because I had a feeling it would turn out badly and it has. Take her into trauma one. How long has she been unconscious?"

Chibs looked at his watch and then said "Anywhere from twenty to thirty minutes."

Tara nodded and looked at the Nurse who had followed her into the trauma room. "I want a complete blood work up done on her. I want an X Ray of her leg and a MRI of her whole body."

The Nurse nodded and wrote down the orders and then ran over to make the call to radiology and then came back. "Technicains will be up soon Dr. Knowles."

Tara nodded and looked at Jax. "I want all of you to wait in the waiting room. I can't work on her and look after you."

Chibs frowned. "Should you even be working on her? She is your sister, Love."

Tara shook her head. "I'll have another Doctor come in and he can be the main Doctor on her case but I need to know that she is alright and that she will be alright and this is the best way to do that."

Chibs nodded. "Alright Love we'll wait in the waiting room."

Opie stepped around everyone and pulled Tara into him for a hug and kissed her on the head. "I'll be in the waiting room if you need me baby."

Tara gave Opie a slight smile and nodded. She focused back on her sister and didn't even hear everyone leave. She only knew that they left because when she next looked up they were all gone except for Jax.

"I thought I told you to go to the waiting room Jax." Tara said.

Jax nodded and looked at Marissa once more before looking at Tara. "You save her Tara. I know she is your sister but she is my old lady even if she doesn't know it yet!"

Tara's mouth dropped open. "I promise Jax we'll save her now get out of here so we can work on her."

Jax nodded but before walking out of the trauma room he walked over to Marissa and kissed her head and growled "Fight damn it Rissa. You fight!"

With that he walked out of the trauma room all the while feeling as if his heart was breaking. He didn't care what he had to do to get her back in his life he would do it. He didn't want to keep on living without her. He needed her to damn much. He still loved her too damn much.

-LAAB-

Once Marissa was taken to X-Ray and for an MRI Tara sat down and sighed. She knew that she would have to get herself together because if she didn't she would end up missing something. When she felt a hand on her shoulder she looked up and gave a slight smile to her friend and fellow Doctor.

"Are you doing alright Tara? I know it's hard seeing your sister like this." Bella said.

Tara nodded. "I'll be alright Bella. I just need to know that she is alright. I can't shake off this feeling of dread I have."

Bella nodded. "We'll find out what is wrong with her once they bring her back from MRI and X-Ray. She'll be alright Tara. You just have to believe in that."

Tara nodded but didn't say anything because at that second she spotted her sister being rolled back into the trauma room. Her and Bella both quickly made their way over to the room and got to work on Marissa. Within minutes Tara and Bella confirmed that Marissa needed surgery.

-LAAB-

Tara walked out to the waiting room and spotted Jax who was pacing and walked over to him. "Jax, we need to move up to the surgery waiting floor. They just rushed Marissa into surgery."

Jax looked at Tara and said "What is wrong with her?"

Tara sighed. "Her leg was broken in several places and is going to need pins as well as a knee replacement. She also has internal bleeding."

Jax walked away from Tara and punched the wall. He couldn't believe that this was happening. He couldn't believe that he had just found her and now that he may possibly lose her. He wanted to scream and shout that it wasn't fair but he had to keep control of himself. He needed to stay calm and collected because if he didn't then he wouldn't be able to help Marissa when she came out of surgery.

A/N 2: Yes I know this chapter is a bit short but the next chapter makes up for it…


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews… I'm glad that you all are liking this story… So I already had the next chapter wrote but I decided to add this chapter and do the chapter I had wrote out as the next chapter… I want to show what Jax is thinking and feeling…

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA….

Jax had followed Tara up to the surgical floor and into the surgical waiting room. Once in there he started pacing. He couldn't stand still because he knew that if he did that he would lose it. As it was he was very close to losing it. He wanted to punch someone or something. He needed to punch someone or something or he was going to lose his fucking mind.

He couldn't shut his eyes because if he did then all he saw was Marissa lying in the middle of the road unconscious and bleeding. Hell even with his eyes wide open he could see her lying in the middle of the road. He wanted to take her place even though he knew that he couldn't. He wanted nothing more than to be the one lying hurt and having surgery. He felt as if his world had just been rocked to its very foundation and he didn't like how that made him feel.

He didn't realize until that moment how much he was still in love with Marissa. He also realized in that moment that he would probably always be in love with Marissa. He fell for her in high school and it didn't show any signs of letting up anytime soon. He didn't know what he would do if Marissa wasn't okay and he didn't know what he would do if Marissa didn't live.

Yes he may have survived without her since they split up but not a day had went by that he didn't think about her. He could screw countless women and the only face he saw was Marissa's. It didn't matter who he was fucking or who was blowing him all he saw was Marissa's face. He has always loved Marissa and he always would and he knew that now. He only survived without it because he knew that she was still breathing. He knew that if she was to die he may as well die too because he loved her that much.

He vowed that as soon as he knew how Marissa was that he would find out who did this to her. He vowed that he would make sure that the person who put Marissa in this hospital paid for it with their life. He vowed that he would revenge what happened to Marissa. Nobody messed with SAMCRO and got away with it. Nobody messed with his OLD LADY and lived through it. If it took the rest of his life he would find who was responsible for Marissa being hurt and then he would peel their skin of layer by layer and enjoy every damn minute of it.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Sorry for the delay in updating! Okay so I decided to add one more chapter before everyone finds out how Marissa is doing… This chapter is short!

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA!

Tara watched as Jax paced and she wished that there was something she could do. She wasn't in love with him anymore and hadn't been in love with him for a very long time. She leaned into Opie with a sigh. She wished that she could take Jax's pain away but she wasn't sure what she could do.

She hated feeling helpless and that is how she felt right now. She wanted to take her sister's place but she couldn't. She felt as if she was on pins and needles as she waited with everyone else on news about her baby sister. She wished now that Jax and Marissa had worked out. If they had then maybe just maybe Marissa wouldn't be fighting for her life in surgery.

She wanted to find out who had done this to her little sister. She was shocked a little at the fact that she wanted to find out so that the guys could kill him. She shook the shock off because she had no doubt that, that is exactly what Jax and Opie would do to the person as soon as they found out who had hurt Marissa.

She wanted to be in the operating room with her sister but she knew that she couldn't be. She knew that she couldn't help operate on her sister because right now her judgment was clouded. She knew that her mind wouldn't be clear until she knew that her sister was alive and well or at least alive and stable. She knew that she wouldn't stop worrying until she saw her sister with her own two eyes.

She looked over and saw Jax with his eyes closed. She knew then that Jax was still completely in love with her sister. She couldn't help but smile at that thought because it meant that once Marissa was well that Jax would make sure that no harm came to her again. She knew that he would protect Marissa and even give up his life for her if he needed too. She just hoped that Marissa would come through this because she knew that if she didn't that Jax wouldn't come back from this. She knew that Jax would lose it and there was no telling what would happen to him or to anyone who got in his way.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Wow it's been a while since I've updated this story and I'm sorry about that... My laptop crashed and I lost everything I had on this story which means I have to start this chapter over again... Enjoy...

Disclaimer: I don't SoA...

Jax was close to losing his mind. He looked at the clock on the wall and scowled when he saw that it had been three hours since Marissa had been rushed into surgery. He started pacing again because he knew that if he stopped for long periods at one time that he would lose his mind and probably end up putting one hell of a whole in the wall. All he wanted to know was how Marissa was doing. All he wanted to know was that she would be okay.

He tipped his head back and pinched the bridge of his nose as he closed his eyes on a wave of pain. He was trying to keep himself together but it was getting harder and harder every second that past. It was getting harder and harder to pretend to be the strong and I don't give a shit about nothing Vice President of the club but he was close to breaking. He wasn't sure if he could last another five minutes before he finally let everything that he was feeling out. Hell he wasn't sure if he would last another minute or even a second before finally breaking down and screaming if he didn't find out soon how Marissa was doing.

He opened his eyes and saw that Tara, Opie, Clay, Tig, Chibs, Juice and Happy were all looking at him. When he heard footsteps he turned towards the doorway and then let out an aggravated breath as he saw this it was his Mom, Charity, Bobby and Piney coming into the waiting room. It wasn't that he wasn't happy that they were there to support Tara and him it was just the fact that he needed to know how Marissa was doing and he needed to know now.

Just as he was getting ready to let out a yell of frustration he heard the double doors being opened and then both him and Tara along with Opie were standing at the entrance to the surgical waiting room. He let out a breath he hadn't even been aware that he was holding when he saw a man in blue scrubs with some kind of cap on his head and a mask handing under his chin with a while lab coat on walk their way. He sent up a silent quick prayer thanking God for finally getting someone out here that can tell them how Marissa was doing.

"How is my sister doing Bruce?" Tara asked as soon as the Doctor came to a stop in front of her, Jax and Opie.

Doctor Bruce Andrews swiped the cap off of his head and then looked at Tara and the two men who were standing on either side of her and sighed. "I'm not going to sugar coat it or lie to you Doctor Knowles."

Before Doctor Andrews could say anything else Tara held up her hand and said "Bruce we've known one another for years you can call me Tara and this is my husband Opie and Marissa's boyfriend Jax. Just tell us what is wrong with Marissa. If the guys don't understand something I'll explain it to them later."

Doctor Andrews nodded and rubbed a hand down his face which gave them a sign just how bad things must have been in the Operating room. "Okay Tara, Marissa is lucky to be alive. In fact she died on the Operating table three different times. Her leg as you know was crushed in three different places and we pinned it back together. She'll need to be in traction for at least a week to give the pins time to set in and the cast will be on her leg for eight weeks. Not only that but the internal bleeding was her caused by the car. Not only did the car run over her leg but it also ran over back and I had to take her spleen out. She has some swelling in her back but I won't know for sure the prognosis on her walking again until the swelling goes down and she wakes up. I'm sorry to say that she is in a coma and I think it's from the concussion. Were you aware that your sister had been sexually assaulted and that she was pregnant?"

Tara's mouth dropped open in shock and she gasped but before she could say anything Jax growled out "What do you mean Marissa was sexually assaulted and that she was pregnant? Is the baby alright?"

Doctor Andrews shook his head. "I'm sorry to say that Marissa miscarried the baby. She was about three months along. The only reason I know that she was sexually assaulted is because I did a D&C to make sure all of the fetus was out of her and did a laperoscopy as well and saw the tearing of the tissue inside her uterus."

Tara swayed on her feet and Opie wrapped his arm around her waist before looking at Doctor Andrews and saying "Is there any way you can get DNA so that we can find out who raped Marissa?"

Doctor Andrews nodded. "Actually I can have the fetus tested for DNA and that should help. I'll also make a report with Charming PD so that they know what I have found out. I'm going to have Marissa moved into ICU once she's out of recovery. I don't have to tell you Tara that if she doesn't wake up in the next forty eight hours that her chances of survival drop drastically. You also know Tara that only family is allowed in the ICU but I'll make sure that the Nurse's know that anyone in this waiting room can go in and see her. I'd like if only one of you stayed over night with her at a time if any of you are planning on it. Once Marissa wakes up I'll be able to check her more thoroughly and tell you if anything else is wrong. We were also able to stop the internal bleeding but I'm going to be keeping a close eye on her head injury because sometimes brain bleeds don't show up until later."

Jax frowned at that and said "What do you mean brain bleeds? Are you telling me that she could have bleeding in her brain?"

Doctor Andrews sighed and gave a curt nod. "Marissa hit her head pretty hard. It's possible that bleeding in the brain could show up but I would say if it doesn't show up in the next twenty four hours that it isn't going to show up at all. Any other questions?"

Jax looked at Doctor Andrews and said "When can I see her? I really need to see that she's okay with my own two eyes or I'm going to lose it."

Doctor Andrews gave Jax a small smile and said "I'll take you back to her recovery room so that you can see her but you can only see her for a minute. Tara is that okay with you?"

Tara looked at Jax and saw all the worry and concern in his eyes and then looked back at Bruce. "Yes, Bruce take him back to see Marissa for a minute. Maybe after he sees her he'll calm down some. Jax, when you're done will you come back out and tell me how she looks?"

Jax gave Tara a slight smile and nodded and then gave her a quick hug and kissed her on the head letting her know that he appreciated her letting him go back to see Marissa. He then followed Doctor Andrews out of the waiting room and back behind the double doors. The entire walk down the hall he kept taking in deep breaths and letting them out. He wasn't sure he was really ready to see Marissa but he didn't have a choice in the matter because if he didn't see her soon he'd lose his mind.

Doctor Andrews came to a stop at the room that Marissa was in and turned towards Jax. "When you go in you will see all types of machines hooked up to Marissa. She has a tube going down her throat that is helping her breathe. She has an I.V going into her arm with fluids. We're also administering pain medicine through her I.V. Her leg will be in the air and it's set in plaster. The reason her leg is up in the air is because we don't want her moving it and dislodging the pins in her leg. You will see a little cut in her belly button as well as in her side but that is because of the laperoscopy. Marissa also has bruises all over her body from where the car ran over her. When you go in there make sure that you talk to her. Just because she is in a coma doesn't mean that she can't hear you. You have two minutes and then I'll need you to come out so that I can check on her again and can get her moved to ICU. Do you understand?"

Jax nodded and then took in a deep breath and pushed open the door and walked in. When he saw how pale Marissa was his heart lurched in his chest and he came to a complete stop. He took in another deep breath and let it out and then took in another one and finally started walking towards Marissa. When he was beside her hospital bed he gently took her hand in his and bent his head and brushed a kiss across her hand. "God Marissa I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for what happened between us. I'm sorry for everything I said and done to you. If I could go back in time and change everything I would. I love you Marissa. I'm still in love with you even after all this time. I need you baby and I need you to fight. If you die then I'm going to end up dying too because I can't and I won't live in a world without you in it. I'm just so damn fucking sorry that it took this to make me realize how much I love you. Please baby I need for you to be okay. I'm going to have to go for now but I'll see you soon. I love you so much Marissa."

He bent his head and brushed his lips across Marissa's forehead before standing straight and walking out of Marissa's recovery room. As soon as he was outside of the recovery room he had to stop and lean against the wall. He felt as if he was suffocating and he had to catch his breath. He couldn't believe how bad Marissa looked. In his head he vowed that not only would he find who had ran her over but he would also find the bastard who dared to rape his woman and he would cut his insides out and enjoy doing it. He slammed his hands against the wall as the anger and rage he felt took over for a minute.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews to the previous chapter... I know that its been a while since I've updated this story but here you are... Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA!

Jax felt a hand on his shoulder and he swung around quickly knocking the person behind him over. He saw that it was Tara and quickly stopped her from falling to the ground. "Oh God I'm sorry Tara."

Tara shook her head and smiled ruefully at Jax. "Nothing to be sorry about Jax. How is she doing?"

Jax shook his head. "She doesn't look like herself at all. My God Tara seeing her like that ate me up. I can't believe how pale and lifeless she looks lying there. I want nothing more than for her to wake up even if she yells at me."

Tara slightly smiled. "Oh believe me Jax she will probably yell at you but if I know one thing it is that my sister loves you. She has always loved you and she always will. No matter if you two are together or apart her heart belongs to you. Plus it wouldn't be Marissa if she wasn't yelling at you."

Jax chuckled a little. "God I've missed her so much Tara. No matter how many sweet butts I was with I only saw her face. No matter how much she hurt me or I hurt her I love her and I always have. I just wish that I could go back in time and change everything. I need her Tara. I need her in order for me to feel alive."

Tara looked at Jax and sighed. "You really do love her don't you Jax? God I didn't know how much you loved her until just now. I'm sorry for everything in the past Jax."

Jax sighed. "The past is in the past Tara. Neither of us can go back and change the past. The only thing we can do is learn from it and move forward. I have always loved Marissa and no matter what I will always love Marissa. There isn't a damn thing in this world that could make me stop loving her. Believe me I've tried everything in the last couple of years to get her out of my system and out of my mind. There hasn't been a day that goes by that I don't think of your little sister Tara. I fell in love with Marissa the first day I met her and I never fell out of love with her and I won't. I really don't think that it is possible for me to stop loving her. But I do have one question for you Tara. Why did you warn her about me all those years ago? I thought you were my best friend."

Tara closed her eyes and sighed and then leaned back up against the wall like Jax was. "I'm not proud of that time in my life Jax. I really didn't mean to warn her off of you like I did but I was scared. I was scared that she would get what I wouldn't and that was the guy she loved. I have loved Opie since High School Jax but he didn't give me the time of day. I saw how much both you and Marissa loved one another and it made me very jealous. I loved you as a best friend Jax and even back then I knew that you and my sister were made to be together. Damn it Jax she fell in love with you when she met you when she was fourteen years old!"

Jax's mouth dropped open in shock. "You mean to tell me Marissa fell in love with me at first sight? Damn it Tara! As much as I loved you as a friend back then didn't you stop to think why I kept coming around day after day to your house? I fell in love with your sister at first sight! Although I didn't realize that it was love until we actually got together. The whole time I was with her I had everything I ever needed or wanted in my life. When she broke up with me because her best friend tried screwing me I didn't do anything. I tried to fight for her but she ran! Then when I run into her at a bar a couple years ago I tried to set things right but once again she ripped my fucking hear out and stomped on it! Hell tonight was the first I even knew of her being back around Charming. Why didn't you tell me she was back?"

Tara sighed and shook her head. "I didn't know how to tell you Jax. I swear I would have told you but in the last couple of years anytime anyone mentioned Marissa's name you clammed up. Besides she made me swear not to tell you that she was back until she was ready to deal with you."

Jax rubbed a hand across his face and leaned his head back onto the wall. "It hurt too fucking much to hear her name being mentioned. Hell anytime I heard someone say the name Marissa my heart would break into a million tiny pieces. Have you ever stopped to think why I didn't go and see Wendy much after she had Abel? It was because I knew that it should have been Marissa that was the mother of my son. It's always been Marissa for me Tara and it always will be Marissa for me. There is no other woman out there for me. There is nobody out there that could compare to Marissa and what I feel for her. God Tara all I want for her to do is wake up."

Tara wrapped her arms around Jax in a tight hug. "She will wake up Jax. You just have to believe that. You have to remember that Marissa always has been and always will be a fighter. She'll keep fighting Jax and she won't give up. You can't give up on her. You have to keep yourself together and be strong because she's going to need you now more than ever."

Jax nodded and hugged Tara back. "Thank you Tara."

Tara smiled and said "You're welcome Jax and thank you. Are you okay to go back out to the waiting room for now?"

Jax nodded and put his hand on Tara's back and guided her down the hallway but not before taking one more look at the recovery room that Marissa was in. He sent up a quick silent prayer to God that he would let Marissa live.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews to the previous chapter... Okay this chapter is short... I want to show Tara's thoughts after her talk with Jax... I'm also going to show Jax's thoughts after his talk with Tara... I'm also going to show Opie's thoughts... Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own SoA!

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Tara let Jax guide her back to the waiting room as she let her mind wander. She felt a lot better than she had in recent years since she finally talked to Jax. When she saw him crying outside of Marissa's room her heart broke for him and for her sister. As she looked into her eyes while they had talked she had realized just how wrong she had been back in High School.

Once they made it back to the waiting room she surprised Jax and herself by giving him a hug and walking back to her seat by Opie. She gave Opie a slight smile when she saw the concern in his eyes. She knew that eventually she would open up to Opie about what she had said and done back in High School but for now she just leaned her head on his shoulder and looked over at Jax who was leaning back against a wall.

She still felt bad for her part in the demise of Jax's and her sister relationship but she hoped that she would be able to help get them back together. As she looked at Jax and saw the sadness in his eyes she vowed silently to herself that she would do whatever it took to get Marissa and him back together. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that the love Jax felt for Marissa was indeed the real thing and she wanted to see them both together again.

She sighed and closed her eyes for a few minutes. She sent up a silent prayer that once Marissa made it out of this alive that Marissa would see just how much Jax still loved her after all these years. She sent up a silent prayer that God would help her be strong enough to help Marissa and Jax both through the next coming days, weeks and months. When she opened her eyes back up she looked back at Jax and when she saw him looking at her she gave him a slight but sad smile letting him know that she was okay.

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Jax leaned back against the wall in the waiting room and thought about the talk he had just had with Tara. He couldn't believe that she had done what she had but in some ways he could understand it. He also knew that Tara had been carrying that around for years and that it had weighed heavily on her shoulders. He recalled that as he guided her back to the waiting room that she had looked like and walked like a heavy weight had been lifted off of her shoulders and he was glad that she was feeling better.

He looked over at her and saw that her eyes were closed. He couldn't help but smile slightly at the sight that she made leaning against Opie. He was glad that Opie had finally opened up his eyes and seen what was in front of him. He just wished that Opie would have done that in High School because maybe if he had then Tara wouldn't have said what she had to Marissa back then. He saw Tara open her eyes and look at him and then smile and he returned her smile.

He knew from the look in her eyes that Tara would do anything and everything possible in helping Jax win Marissa back. He knew without a shadow of a doubt that Tara would make sure that she righted the wrongs she had done years ago. He could only hope and pray that it worked. He didn't want to have to go another second, another minute, another day, another week let alone another month without Marissa by his side and in his life.

He silently vowed that as soon as Marissa woke up that he would be there in her face making sure that she knew just how much he loved her. He vowed that he would make sure that Marissa understood that she always had and always would have his heart in the palm of her hand. He could only hope and pray that he could and would win Marissa's heart again. He needed her like he needed air to breathe and he hated that it took this to make him realize just how much he missed her, how much he needed her and how much he wanted her. He silently vowed to himself that he would spend every minute of every day of the rest of his life making sure that Marissa knew just what she meant to him and just how much he loved her and just how much he has always loved her and just how much he would always love her.

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Opie wrapped his arm around Tara and looked down at her. He could tell that there was something wrong with her besides the fact that her sister was fighting for her life but he knew better than to push her right now. The only thing he could do was be there for her and that is exactly what he was going to do. He knew that seeing Marissa the way she was had hurt her terribly and he hated that he couldn't protect her from that. He hated that he wasn't able to protect her from that emotional pain.

He made a vow that he would make sure that he made the person pay who hurt Marissa once the club found him. He vowed that he would make sure to help Tara and Marissa in any way, shape or form that he could. He may have not been able to protect Marissa from getting hurt like she been but he could and would make sure that no other harm came to her.

He looked over at Jax and saw the pain in his best friend's eyes and he knew then that Jax was still in love with Marissa. He wished that he could also take away the pain that Jax was feeling. He could tell from the look in Jax's eyes that as soon as they found out who had hurt Marissa that the person's hours of living were numbered and he vowed that he would help Jax do whatever he wanted to do. He would make sure that Jax knew that he was there for him just like he was there for Tara. He wouldn't let Jax shoulder all the pain alone because he knew that if Jax did that he would blow and there was no telling who would be on the receiving end Jax's anger.


End file.
